Fantasy football sitcom premieres tonight

Can you find comedy out of a bunch of misfits playing fantasy football together? You sure can if you had Paul Klatt in your cast. FX is giving it a go without Paul at 9:30 p.m. (CT) with the premiere of "The League." Sun-Times critic Paige Wiser gives her review. Given the state of sitcoms on TV, my hopes are high, which could be a dangerous thing.

Week 7 review

The Madden Division is as jumbled as ever before with some teams at 4-3 and others at 3-4. Simo's Posse have dug themselves out of a hole with a victory over Henry to gain some respectability in the Madden race.

The playoff picture in the Cosell Division is starting get clearer. Newt and Sharks (5-2 each) have two-game leads over their closest rivals. Newt and the Sharks appear difficult to catch. Is there any wonder that each of the quarterbacks are P. Manning and Brees?

Stan in the New York Times

In a different century, Serkus owner Stan Goff (pictured with Trixie) left newspapers behind to join the high-profile world of industry publications. He is still a stringer for the Daily Herald, so it's been hard for him to leave sports totally behind, but as the editor of a dentistry mag, Goff was recently quoted in the New York Times.

 

What would John Madden do?

Take a look at the Finks League's current standings in the Madden Division.

During a game, a FOX Sports director pulls up the graphic of the Madden Division on Madden's monitor. Madden yells: "Look here, you see this?"

Madden takes his telestrator pen and circles the Las Vegas Posse: 2-4. "You see here? The Posse? They're are not out of it."

No shit John, the Posse are only one game back in a five-team division that features, get this, a four-way tie for first place. You've got to be kidding me. Madden erases his circle around the Posse. Then he scrawls circles around the remaining teams in the divison, all 3-3 entering Week 7.

"You see this? The rest of the teams in the division? It could be anbody's division to win. Boom. Bam," Madden says, missing the Thank you, Ma'm.

Madden was never known for insight. He made millions as a commentator with schtick, and a good agent that slapped his name on a popular video game. I wonder what Cris Collinsworth would have to say about the current state of the Finks League's Madden Division?

Week 6: Around the league

Serkus owner Stan Goff: "(Chris you obviously caught me on a bad week...pretty sure I was last in the league in points scored prior to Moss breaking out in the snow and then Kaeding adding 16 points last night).

Think Larry Johnson scored a season-high (first) 3 points for me and so I won even with a a giant goose egg from my QB."


Barrels owner Chris Traczek: "Just a typical week that proves why fantasy football can be so (John) maddening. Moss does nothing for 5 weeks, then has 3 TDs and 125 receiving yards in the week I'm playing him, in a snow/ice storm no less, while Stan probably would have started Folk if Dallas wasn't on a bye, then ends up getting 16 points from his second-string kicker. It wouldn't have mattered since my team was so bad this week, with the Eagles (and McNabb) laying an egg against Oakland, Steven Jackson now going 6 weeks without sniffing the end zone, Anquan Boldin falling just short of receiving yards again and Brandon Jacobs losing a TD thanks to a phantom holding call.

I'd like to think this stuff evens out and I'll win (or have won, in the past) a week like this somewhere down the line, but you can't help but feel it's probably like baseball--more line drives seem to be caught than bloops fall in (unless you're the Minnesota Twins)."

 

Goff responds: "I didn't see ANY of this coming....I figured McNabb eats up a Raiders team that just gave up 44 to the Giants; Jacobs gets you 1 or 2 TDs in a shootout with the Saints and I get my usual minimal output from my backfield and so far, very little from Moss. Can't believe I've gone 6 weeks without a legitimate RB (much less two) and I'm somehow 3-3. (It is a little like the Twins winning yet another division title even after one of their top hitters gets injured with weeks still left to play)."

Week 6 review

Where are the dominant teams in the Finks League this season? On the flip side, is there a truly hideous team? Simo's Posse is off to a slow start, but does anybody believe that one of the winningest owners in the League won't turn things around. Simo is a proven master of the free-agent pickup. I am always worried about parity due to the Finks League's auction-bid process rather than draft. It looks like Dah Commish has nothing to worry about this season.

In Week 6, first place Newt lost and last place Posse won to tighten things up in the division races. Newt was victimized by player of the week runner-up Quags RB Jones-Drew JAX's 23 Finks points on the weekend. The Posse chose well going with QB Brady NE over QB Rodgers GB in Week 6. Brady paid off with a weekend-high 25 points powered by his six TD passes against TEN.

Week 7 is the first of three weeks in the middle of the season devoted to cross-over play between the Cosells and Maddens. You will see some repeat matches, but stay calm. Week 7 and Week 9 are randomly picked games among crossovers. Week 8 is part of the regular rotation. It's confusing, but somewhere along the way it works out. Former Finks League owner Bill Stone came up with the league schedule. Anyone who has ever met Stone, realizes he knows his stuff.

Good luck to you all.

Week 5: Around the league

Serkus owner Stan Goff: "I'm guessing Michael Turner put up big points for someone....I'll do my result in a minute...think I may have snapped a 3-game losing streak thanks in large part to Maurice Leggett's inability to wrap up Miles Austin on two long TDs....in a matter of minutes Romo went from another Fantasy stinker to 350 yards and two scores....

Speaking of Leggett, here he is with Ryan after being named the Chiefs top rookie last year...a real nice guy and last year he scored a couple TDs on interceptions and fake field goals botched by the Raiders....but on Sunday Austin slipped away from him twice and each time also broke away from former Bear Mike Brown.

"Thanks to Braylon Edwards getting a TD on his first catch with his new team, I pulled out a 36-32 victory over vb5ds. Got my usual ZERO from Larry Johnson (despite 21 carries) and got another disappointing showing from Randy Moss (1 catch), but somehow managed to pull out the win, which would not have been possible if the Cowboys had not blown a lead to KC in the final minute of regulation....Romo's yardage and TD in OT was the difference. Big Ben had 14 points to lead the way for Joanna, while Romo got me 13 points."


Barrels owner Chris Traczek: "Thanks to staunch defensive stand by the Arizona Cardinals, the Creighton Barrels held off the Ham N Eggers 36-33 this week in Finks League action."

Week 5 review

I can't remember the last time one of my Shakespeare teams won a big match. Thanks to Player of the Week RB Turner ATL, who finally broke out with 21 points, I was able to topple undefeated Newt 50-26. With four players going in MNF, I wasn't sure what to make of Newt's possible comeback in the weekend. It quickly became apparent, however, that the Titans could not match up to the Colts. The most amazing thing was that my QB Rivers SD was on the bye week and he came into the weekend as my highest Finks points scorer. Wow.

So this is what winning three in a row feels like? My Chris Henry V started out 0-2 and suddenly we're chasing down Cosell Division leading Newt. Of course, the good feeling could end with a loss to the Sharks in Week 6. So it goes livin' the high life in the Finks League.

Missing in action

Did you know vb5ds owner Joanna Terraciano led the league with 64 Finks points in Week 5 despite having both PK Elam ATL and PK Akers PHI on the bye? Now, that's getting it done. The rookie boss is off to a 3-1 start after beating BF/fellow teacher/defending Finks champ Kris Herigodt in Week 5.

More Goff news

Serkus Act owner Stan Goff believes he was going to be quoted on a recent New York Times story on dentistry. Stan edits for Modern Hygienist. If anyone finds it, please send Dah Commish the link.

A perfect storm of Finks League coaches

We are everywhere. Serkus Act owner Stan Goff, a stringer for the Daily Herald, covered a recent Aurora Central-Montini girls volleyball match and was surrounded by Finks League owners on both sides of the court. Here's how Goff tells it: "I went to Aurora Central Catholic Monday for a volleyball match (and breast cancer awareness fundraiser that was supposed to include an appearance from Greg Olsen, but instead his brother showed)...but as it turns out, me and two other Finks owners were on hand....Chris was there watching his daughters play for the sophomore and varsity Chargers squads, and Joanna was there as an asst. coach for Montini...."

Week 4 review

With a pair of Co-players of the week and another 13 Finks points on Monday night from QB Rodgers GB, Simo's Posse became the last winless team to pick up a victory. Simo crushed the Barrels 53-37. Simo's Week 3 trade to pick up Rodgers finally paid off. It seems hard to believe, but Simo has gone with Rodgers in back-to-back matches and he has sit down QB Brady NE to do it.

Eye of Newt remains the last undefeated team in the league. Newt still has a ways to go to equal Mike Wilcox's league record for nine consecutive wins in 1995. I would have to check the schedule page from the year, but I also believe Wilcox's record was established with a season-opening streak much like Newton's.

Your favorite NFL teams

Thanks for your input on your favorite NFL teams. I wanted to use the info in some way with the new "NFL news" page I had for the Finks League Web site. However, I do not know what's wrong with the Google gadgets I added to provide brief news around the NFL by division. I am having trouble with some of the divisions downloading. As a space filler, I added a gadget box off Google called NFL Photos. What I did not know is that many of the photos were ridiculous pics of "eye candy" cheerleaders. I thought the feature would only have pictures of actual NFL action.

Since I have no use for cheerleaders (NFL, college, high school and especially youth football), that box has been replaced. Cheerleaders are an awful sexist remnant from the 1950s. If my daughters are interested in football some day, I would rather have them play defensive back or wide receiver than standing on the sideline. I don't think I could handle going to games -- because my daughter is a cheerleader? There could not possibly be any parents out there that would attend a youth football game to see the cheerleaders? That would be like being a band parent at Friday night high school football games, who leave after the halftime show.

I digress, as usual. When asking Finks owners about their favorite teams, I did not know Dick Quagliano and Jeff Newton are Bears season ticket holders. Do they sit near each other? Just wondering.

Chris Traczek was by far the most passionate Finks owner about his team from the Land of Ten Thousand Lakes.


"Teams I hate: Cowboys, Raiders, Steelers, Dolphins--mainly any teams that beat the Vikes in a Super Bowl (the last three) or won a playoff game in an extremely lucky fashion (Cowboys in 'Hail Mary' game) during my formative years in the 1970s. I was too young to remember the SB loss to the Chiefs, though I do get a knot in my stomach when they show the NFL Films footage of the overly smug Hank Stram laughing at them in SB IV. He deserved to later coach the hideous 1976-77 Saints (sorry, George)," according to Traczek.